The Saga of Winter Intensive Revealed

So, in Korea, there is a little something called "Winter Intensives" at every hogwan. There are also "Summer Intensives", but having already experienced that, I can say that summer was shorter (only 5 weeks) and far less...well... intense. Here was my teaching schedule:

8:00am to 2:30pm - 6 classes of 55 minute duration
4:00pm to 8:00pm - 4 classes of 55 minute duration

That's a 12 hour work day with 10 teaching hours. I will be quite frank with you and say that I have never been so exhausted in my life. Ten hours of lesson plans that are all conversationally based and structured like "performances", with ten completely different classes each day, seeing over 80 different students each day, lesson planning brand new material for all of them... It was harrowing. Even though we got Wednesdays, Saturdays and Sundays off, the tiredness has sort of stuck with me like a lingering virus. Also, since these are a precious few Saturdays to actually socialize, I've packed them full of doing just that. (More on that to come later.)

That was for the entire month of January, and now we have 2 weeks of my previous schedule (6 days a week, 6 teaching hours in the evenings) and then the last 2 weeks of February we resume the intensive schedule above, and then it's back to evenings again until I leave in June. All of that to say, I have been too tired to blog. I didn't really know that was possible, but putting some pics up on facebook and responding to a few emails now and then was about all I could muster. Most days I would just come home, eat, and flop into bed and enjoy the feeling of not standing. I would also lay there and ponder things like, "I'm too old for this..." So I apologize to the handful of people who may actually care what I write here (at least my parents?) for having been so negligent with my blog. I have thought of you, I really have...

Though I work at a very good company, and have incredible co-workers, the experience of winter here - complete with being cold all the time, working all through the holidays and the schedule mentioned above - have soured me a lot. I love my students, but now that this crazy time of year is winding down, I feel my motivation kind of winding down with it. I'm thinking more about what awaits me in the States when I go home in 4.5 months, thinking more about purpose, what really matters in life, all that stuff that swirls around in the head when you sense another change is coming. I love Korea, and I love so many people that I've met here, but I don't love the way Korean business treats its employees: like machines. And its children, for that matter. Little adorable studying machines.

I think I need a good dose of spring, and I'm very thankful that it's right around the corner. Winter blues are real, I've discovered, and it will be nice not to have to wear the entire contents of my closet when I want to go somewhere, and to see green things growing, and to just take a walk when I want to. I miss my walks.

Yes, my mood is a bit low today, and the tone is probably coming through. I will say, though, that God is good, and I am so thankful for the blessings He gives in everyday, not the least of which has been the strength to do this job well for the last few weeks. There were two morning when I was just so tired that I literally prayed through sobs, "God, I do not have the strength to do this, but your Word says that when I am weak, then your strength is revealed. I believe that promise is for me, and I ask you for the strength to not just survive this day, but to have a really GOOD day, and to be a really good teacher." And both of those days were really good days. I've been a Christian for many years now, but this is the first time I've really relied on God's strength in such a tangible way. It's exciting to see and experience that His promises are true for me. And for all of us.

Later in the week (hopefully tomorrow) I'll post some pictures of the things I've been doing, including Gina's wedding and my first flying lesson! But for now, time to get back to class. Please drop me a line anytime if you're out there and reading this! It's always good to hear from you.